“How the personality systems look charted !” by kerasotes

“I have reworked the charting and added new parts.  I now have a psychologist, a doctor with a PhD named Shawn Morgan of the Behavioral Health Clinic at The Marina here in Everett Washington United States of America.  He is a specialist in Integrating Personalities.  I see him May 17th 2016.  He is amazing.  He has a book I am to read entitled: “COPING WITH TRAUMA-RELATED DISSOCIATION – SKILLS TRAINING FOR PATIENTS AND THERAPISTS” BY SUZETTE BOON, KATHY STEELE, & ONNO VAN DER HART.  I have posted this elsewhere.  I had my first meeting with him and explained things.  I explained how there were 51 of us and that there are now just 2.  He’s intrigued with me.  He says I’ve done well eliminating all the others and am ridding myself of The System and My Opposite [Cruelty].  I told him my Daddy [The Him] made me to do this!  He had to write that down on his magic board in black and blue.  I am to have intensive counselling but my case manager has ignored me and him for I have not heard from Patrick nor his other colleague since my appointment in the beginning of April.  How Sad! But there is a place I can go every day I read in his chart to me and that is Compass Health down the street and I plan to pop in there today to see about it and I will take my book I made with all my stuff in it there with me.  The Battle Has Been Hell And It Is Killing Him and Me.  I warned my opposite of this and told him that since he cannot run this body, he will die before me and that will be the end of it and us and I will remain just one and whole and well even though I was made that way and don’t need him to integrate or anything else and can take him away and kill him any time I want.  Michael told me to play with the thing forever.  I have tired of playing with the cat.  I am not the mouse either, the mouse died.  So, this is just a new update on How The Personality System that Killed The Original Is Going To Die and Fail!  I have reached the point where finally “Cruelty” is almost integrated.  I have worked hard at this all by myself alone.  I had instructions on how to do this from the original Michael and “The Me That Cared About Himself” both of whom I miss so very, very much.  It makes me cry at times that they both had to go and die.  It left me alone to deal with all this and thanks to “The Me That Cared About Himself” caring so about me to help me with all this.  There were all the diseases that “the others” all of the personalities, fragments, fractures, re-fragments, and, re-fractures did to this body way before I came into existence or being.  No One Wanted This Body But Me and that’s what I told “The Me” and he understood the first day he came to us after “Mike 2” left.  He explained that they had gone into 50 garbage cans and had tortured Michael To Death and Mike 2.  They tortured themselves really for Michael went away as he couldn’t stand what they were doing.  They sat outside in the bird seeds and bird droppings at Twin Firs in Lynnwood Washington USA for three days and wouldn’t wash themselves.  Michael finally came back and did that for them all.  I helped him and so did “Daddy” and “The He” {the first helper}.  Then there were all the pollen’s they put into themselves starting in April 2013 after “Mike 2” came.  I reported this to my doctors and so did “The Me”!  We took it upon ourselves to do this amongst the protest of “the others”.  It was after we found out about the Listeria and its 88 diseases.  Then there were the cancers – 8 of them that we had to deal with.  First there were all the tests:  the colonoscopy and the endoscopy; then the blood tests;  then the parasite tests; then the PSA tests for the prostate cancer; and, then the nuclear scan tests with the gamma radiations and that was when we found out there were 7 other cancers besides the colon cancer of the Listeria and perhaps from “Mother the I” downing 3/4’s of a bottle of liquid Silver Polish on December 13th, 2013 when we lost our home at Holly Village in Everett Washington USA.  The attorneys on the east coast said all the cancers came from the Listerias.  All the tests showed that we didn’t have it but we did the doctor at the Poly Clinic in Seattle Washington USA said.  He dropped us because we were going to sue Snoqualmie Ice Cream because they told us to.  Thanks to the people of the QFC Store on Broadway, Everett Washington USA and their doctors and the doctors at California of the Snoqualmie Ice Cream Folks who helped us with all of this and the manager Kay of the QFC store and her people who got us all the rest of the things we needed to proceed with getting cured.  Although my doctor and “The Me’s” doctor – Dr. Aaron Brown told me he killed all the pollen’s and cancers and other diseases, I think he lied to me.  He just wrote me and wants to re-test me in May and I am going to let him.  I am going to insist upon another Gamma Radiation Nuclear Scan and more X-Rays for the broken hip bone and other bones that were broken from “Cruelty’s” 6 Falls on March 8, 2016 when I kept myself in the hospital and triage for three days because I didn’t want to be alone with him.  I have the papers for this x-ray for the hip and I have asked my QFC pharmacists about the Oxycodons that Dr. Shawn Morgan said I am to be on.  According to Google’s Dictionary those are Hydrocodones and I am already on them.  So I have asked them about it and they told me to ask my doctors at the Everett Clinic when I go for my hip x-ray this week.  I will do so.  So that should bring you all up to date on this and all these things I alone have had to go through all by myself without help from anyone.  It has been Hell and I mean Hell!  “Hell Itself” [“me, Franklin” or “The Last Mike Kerasotes”] has had it with “the thing” as Michael called “Cruelty” in ‘The Lynnwoods’ as we all called it afterwards.  I have almost finished my task of eliminating him.  He can barely make voices or fault this body and its mouth and has lost the ability to shit me or shit my pants as he {“Cruelty”} calls it.  I found that out today.  He’s down to just a couple of sets of voices and a few noises.  He is dying and that is fine with me for Michael said even if he dies, I get his memories.  So that’s how it goes.  I was made to kill him and kill him I will and am.  “

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“I have to rework this and make sure that all 51 personalities, their fragments, their fractures show and the dates that go with this. This will take me some time but I shall attempt this and chart…”

Source: “How the personality systems look charted !” by kerasotes

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“I don’t know what happened to “How the personality systems look charted!” by kerasotes went but it disappeared !!! AWFUL !!!!!  I am upset and unhappy about this.  I did print it out at the Library before I went to see my new therapist on Integrating the Last Personality.  I am glad I did that though.  So maybe I can photograph that or see if the Librarians can insert it into here and have it on my WordPress.com pages again.  I will try to do this this week.  “

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“I then can go on and write out why all the personalities came.  I can go on and write the reasons.  I can go on and write the whys, et cetera.  I can go on and finish this.  “The Me” did not want “Cruelty” to know all the reasons why “the others” came and he said we all should know how we got here, why we got here, and where and when it happened for all of us and that means that we all knew about everyone’s existences.  But “Cruelty” has or had this habit of ‘throwing away his memories’ and that was his fatal error.  He says he doesn’t remember when his birthday is or who made him or where and I finally told him part of it.  Michael Made Him to Help Him Keep Marge & George from Sexually Abusing Him.  He didn’t like that.  He turned traitor the same day I think and from that point on persecuted Michael and drove him to death.  It was his idea to kill Michael “The Me” said to us.  It may be that he didn’t strike the first blow but it was his idea to kill Michael.  I know this for I was there.  Although Michael wanted to die and leave because he couldn’t stand being not well or unwell and said to us all that he was going to die because we wouldn’t integrate.  I pleaded with all of us to do what Michael wanted, but no one did so.  Once “The Me” got here, he was able to rid us of most all of the personalities that were left.  I did the rest after he left in October of 2015.  It took me two months to do so.  It has taken me since the last day of October to rid this body of “the systems” and “cruelty” and “the leftover personality fractures” and that is where I am.  I really want to read Dr. Shawn Morgan’s book – COPING WITH TRAUMA-RELATED DISSOCIATION – SKILLS TRAINING FOR PATIENTS AND THERAPISTS” , I really do.  But, I have to wait for the Inter-Library Systems of Two Libraries to get it for me for I cannot afford the $37.00 Book.  Darn it.  I’ve read everything our Main Everett Public Library has on Personality Disorders.  I have watched all their awful movies about it.  I don’t mean that the movies were awful it is just that it was awful watching what other people went through especially the Halley Barrie one on Dissociative Disorders.  That was a cruel, cruel movie.  It is on DVD.  If you are interested, please watch it and/or read her book.  I did. Well, I am tired of typing and writing and am about to quit and go out for one last walk in the wind and the rains and cold and have another filthy cigarette as Michael called them in Egypt!”

“Good Night All!” 

 

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