“”REGRETS AND WHY THERE WASN’T FRIENDSHIP BETWEEN US.” “by kerasotes””

REGRETS AND WHY THERE WASN’T FRIENDSHIP BETWEEN US

 

This is about me and him, the other, and why there are so many regrets and why there was not a friendship between us.  I friended him 8 years ago and tried every day to help him.  I was the only one to do this besides Michael.  Michael gave up on this.  I did not.  Although he never friended me back, I continued my work in trying to help him.  I defended him against Michael and The Others – all 55 of them [although there were 3 helpers who had left before me who are included in this number].  I did this because he had thoughts that were worthwhile and Michael should have acted upon them.  Otherwise Michael would have lost important things and especially his ideas and plans and stuffs that he wanted to do for us all. 

I am Franklin.  The other is Phillip.  I don’t use his name anymore because he never uses mine.  When he does, it is done to taunt me and hurt me and blame me and be insulting.  For instance, I used to say goodnight to him and tell him to go to sleep.  I gave that up for this reason:  once I said these words, he would talk all night not caring about his sleep and his restoring and rebuilding his damaged body.  I gave it up because every time I wanted or we wanted something he sent the brain the signals to piss this body and to shit it.  That’s why Michael and many of the others called him ‘shitty thing’.  Most of the others never spoke to him.  It is because he never spoke to them – not even to the other parts of him that fractured off and split from him because of his abuse and horrors and his meanness and selfishness. 

We all tired of this.  We all tired of him playing God.  We all tired of his orders.  We all tired of him and his typos and I have to do everything wrong to make it worse here instead of better which is what the rest of us wanted. 

Then when Michael died, he became even worse.  Every Helper that we got after that [and there were only two] became the target of his madness and meanness and horror.  He ordered us to be silent for 24 hours before we could leave.  He ordered us to do his bidding.  He threatened us even though he was unable to hurt or do anything to us while the Helpers {Mike 2 and The Mike 3 or The Me] who came after Michael fled us due to his shitting their pants and sheets and hopes and dreams and fun. 

I think that I should write that this was because he really had no self, no me, no I to work with for he had fractured years ago.  He never really understood what fun was.  We were told that Voices or Voicing Hurt More Than Anything and that is when he began his lifelong pursuit to never stop talking in them.  Isn’t that pitiful, awful, mean and vicious, isn’t it?  We all thought so.  So when we all were taken out for fun, he ‘the you’, spoiled it for us.  He would ruin every moment of our time with Michael or any other one of us or all of us and the helpers. 

He was a traitor.  He was a horror unto himself alone for he created himself in pieces from doing all the wrong things he could.  He played ‘I’m a little boy’ to death.  He thought that made him an innocent and therefore and thereby not guilty of doing a crime or a hurt or a horror.  He split himself in so many ways that his original Helper Self Died.  Michael called that or him ‘Cruelty’ and it is because he’d only do cruel things and never ever would help Michael again after he got here in 1956 after Michael was 5 years old. 

I on the other hand was made and built to take everyone away for they were all trying to kill Michael the day his helper Jayson left.  That was April 20th, 2009 at 8:00 a.m.  I arrived at 10:32 a.m. and I told everyone why are you hurting Michael, he is the only one we can integrate with and make ourselves whole and one with him and well.  I was appalled.  I’ve told you this before.  I want it on here now.  I was what you call a horror – a personality made by a personality in order to keep that personality here and take the original away.   I Refused To Do This and Turned from Traitor to Helper and helped Michael until he left or died.  I did the same with Mike 2 and Mike 3 ‘The Me’.

So why did Phillip never friend this body nor me?  Why didn’t he want to have fun?  Why didn’t he want to enjoy the last days of our lives?  Why didn’t he want to be friends and not hurt anymore?  Why didn’t he want to integrate his other parts and be whole like me?

He has no answer for this but I have given you one [or them].

So I Regret Being Here & Want To Leave and this I cannot do for he, the other, and ‘the you’ cannot run a body by himself.  He can last only about 5 minutes before he breaks down and goes unconscious and blacks out and falls.  I found that out in August for I timed his falls and blackouts and unconscious spells.  I reminded him of what my Dr. Shawn Morgan, Ph. D said over at The Behavioral Health Clinic at The Pier by Anthony’s Restaurant.  I reminded him that he had to do this also.  He had to do the work to correct himself and his cognitive errors and ways.  He had to leave to keep his promise and his word so that I could go on doing the things I planned to get this body well. 

No one wanted the body after Phillip began diseasing it.  He’d go into garbage cans to throw away priceless books and things of Michael’s so Michael could not have them and his heir could not either.  That really was the reason.  He also sat out on the balcony in Lynnwood in the bird shit and mildewed seeds and played with them to Michael’s protests and all of ours.  He wouldn’t let Michael back into his body to clean it.  This went on for days and days and days and perhaps for two or three weeks.  The horror of this was enough to split himself further.  He became insane and impossible to deal with.  50 garbage cans he traipsed into and out of during his 60 years on this earth.  This is what we had to deal with every day of our lives.  He didn’t want to be well; he wanted to be the most evil thing on this earth. 

Then he took Michael’s beautiful home away again.  He took the next one away again.  And finally after Michael’s Death in April 2013, when Mike 2 got there to help us move to Hawaii, he did it again and lost us everything. 

I shall continue this later………………………….

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s